How to Answer the 'I'll brag about you to my friends if' Hinge Prompt

Hey there, I'm Paw, and I've got 136 ways to answer the "I'll brag about you to my friends if" Hinge prompt that'll make your matches' jaws drop. If that's not enough to get you laid, you might as well delete the app now.

Want to see how you stack up in the cutthroat world of online dating? Check out Swipestats and visualize your data. Now, let's turn you into the talk of the town, shall we?

How to Answer "I'll Brag About You to My Friends If"

1. You can recite all the Pokemon in alphabetical order
2. You know the secret handshake to Area 51
3. You've mastered the art of parallel parking in NYC
4. You can fold a fitted sheet perfectly
5. You've never lost a game of rock-paper-scissors
6. You can name all the elements on the periodic table
7. You've beaten Dark Souls without dying once
8. You can solve a Rubik's cube blindfolded
9. You've never sent a "u up?" text at 2 AM
10. You can speak fluent Klingon
11. You've never used Comic Sans unironically
12. You can moonwalk better than Michael Jackson
13. You've memorized pi to 100 decimal places
14. You can open a beer bottle with anything but a bottle opener
15. You've never ghosted anyone
16. You can do a perfect Australian accent
17. You've never posted a gym selfie
18. You can make the perfect grilled cheese sandwich
19. You've read every book on my shelf
20. You can win at Monopoly without losing any friends
21. You've never used the phrase "It's not you, it's me"
22. You can name all of Taylor Swift's exes in chronological order
23. You've never watched an episode of The Office
24. You can juggle chainsaws (or at least three oranges)
25. You've never used a pickup line from the internet
26. You can fold origami cranes with your toes
27. You've never asked "Do I look fat in this?"
28. You can beatbox the entire "Fresh Prince" theme song
29. You've never Instagram-stalked an ex
30. You can name all the US presidents in reverse order
31. You've never used "LOL" when you weren't actually laughing
32. You can make a perfect omelet with one hand
33. You've never sent an unsolicited dick pic
34. You can recite the entire script of "The Princess Bride"
35. You've never used the dog filter on Snapchat
36. You can navigate without Google Maps
37. You've never posted a motivational quote on social media
38. You can whistle the entire "Star Wars" theme
39. You've never used the phrase "Live, Laugh, Love" unironically
40. You can do a handstand pushup while reciting Shakespeare

Sarcastic Ways to Answer "I'll Brag About You to My Friends If"

1. You can turn oxygen into carbon dioxide
2. You've mastered the art of existing
3. You can successfully adult at least 3 days a week
4. You've never tripped up the stairs (only down)
5. You can read minds (but only when they're thinking about food)
6. You've perfected the art of looking busy at work
7. You can time travel (but only into the future, one second at a time)
8. You've never used "literally" figuratively
9. You can predict the weather with 50% accuracy
10. You've mastered the ability to sleep with your eyes open during meetings
11. You can telepathically communicate with plants (they just don't listen)
12. You've never used "your" when you meant "you're"
13. You can speak fluent sarcasm in seven languages
14. You've survived a full day without coffee
15. You can read upside down and backwards (but only in Comic Sans)
16. You've never asked "Is this gluten-free?" at a steakhouse
17. You can calculate the tip without using your phone
18. You've gone a whole day without checking Instagram
19. You can tell the difference between Pepsi and Coke blindfolded
20. You've never used the phrase "Let's circle back on that"
21. You can remember what you had for breakfast three days ago
22. You've never posted a picture of your food on social media
23. You can tie your shoelaces with your eyes closed
24. You've never used the word "synergy" in a business meeting
25. You can identify dogs by breed (even the made-up ones)
26. You've never said "I'm not like other girls/guys"
27. You can resist clicking on clickbait articles
28. You've never used "YOLO" as an excuse for bad decisions
29. You can tell the difference between "there," "their," and "they're"
30. You've never asked "Do you know who I am?" to get special treatment
31. You can name all seven dwarfs without Googling
32. You've never used a selfie stick in public
33. You can eat spicy food without pretending it's not hot
34. You've never posted a gym check-in without actually working out
35. You can tell the difference between real and fake news
36. You've never used the phrase "I'm not racist, but..."
37. You can resist the urge to pop bubble wrap
38. You've never claimed to be "fluent" in a language you took for two semesters
39. You can walk past a pet without trying to pet it
40. You've never used the excuse "Mercury is in retrograde"

Even More Ways to Answer "I'll Brag About You to My Friends If"

1. You can name all the Kardashians (including the Jenners)
2. You've never used Comic Sans in a professional document
3. You can do a perfect cartwheel
4. You've read the terms and conditions before clicking "I agree"
5. You can make the perfect cup of coffee
6. You've never sent a "Hey" as a first message on a dating app
7. You can name all the characters in Game of Thrones
8. You've never posted a gym selfie with the caption "Rise and grind"
9. You can speak in a British accent without sounding ridiculous
10. You've never used the phrase "It is what it is"
11. You can make a soufflé without it deflating
12. You've never posted a cryptic status for attention
13. You can name all the bones in the human body
14. You've never used the pickup line "Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?"
15. You can solve a Sudoku puzzle in under 5 minutes
16. You've never posted a motivational quote attributed to the wrong person
17. You can do a pull-up (just one is impressive enough)
18. You've never used "Reply All" by mistake
19. You can name all 50 states in alphabetical order
20. You've never posted a picture of your feet at the beach
21. You can make a perfect French braid
22. You've never used "affect" when you meant "effect"
23. You can identify a wine's country of origin by taste
24. You've never posted a photo with the caption "I woke up like this"
25. You can do a proper push-up (none of that knees-on-the-ground nonsense)
26. You've never used the phrase "No offense, but..."
27. You can recite the alphabet backwards
28. You've never posted a bathroom mirror selfie
29. You can make a perfect origami crane
30. You've never used "BAE" unironically
31. You can name all the characters in Friends
32. You've never posted a photo of your boarding pass before a flight
33. You can touch your nose with your tongue
34. You've never used the phrase "I'm not like other girls/guys"
35. You can do a convincing Elvis impression
36. You've never posted a photo of your meal with #foodporn
37. You can name all the winners of American Idol
38. You've never used "literally" when you meant "figuratively"
39. You can do the Macarena without looking it up
40. You've never posted a gym selfie with the caption "No pain, no gain"
41. You can name all the characters in The Office
42. You've never used the phrase "Living my best life"
43. You can do a perfect Scottish accent
44. You've never posted a passive-aggressive status about your ex
45. You can name all the US state capitals
46. You've never used the pickup line "Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see"
47. You can do a handstand without wall support
48. You've never posted a photo with the caption "New phone, who dis?"
49. You can name all the winners of RuPaul's Drag Race
50. You've never used the phrase "Sorry not sorry"
51. You can do the worm (the dance move, not the creature)
52. You've never posted a photo of your plane wing from the window seat
53. You can name all the characters in Harry Potter
54. You've never used the phrase "Thoughts and prayers" on social media
55. You can do a perfect cat-eye with eyeliner
56. You've never posted a gym selfie with the caption "Beast mode activated"

The Grand Finale: Seal the Deal

Look, if none of these 136 ways to answer "I'll brag about you to my friends if" get you a date, it might be time to face the music: your profile probably sucks harder than a black hole with a drinking problem.

But don't worry, there's hope for even the most hopeless cases. Head over to Swipestats and get a reality check on how you're really doing in the digital dating jungle. And if you're feeling brave (or desperate), consider getting our Swipestats dating profile review to find out why your matches are as rare as a unicorn sighting.

Remember, in the world of online dating, it's not about being perfect. It's about being perfectly you – just with better photos and wittier responses. Now go and conquer, you magnificent disaster.